Atomic Nerds

Or, how Tank came to be all bloody. Part II; don’t you hate it when sequels replace established characters with “the next generation”?

Contextual information: Indy was occupying our guest room over the weekend.

~Prologue~
LabRat: *Rises weekendishly late, feeds dogs. Notes outside front windows, Indy balancing precariously on on two crates while Stingray does something purposeful with a hose. Considers. Decides all things duly considered, would be better off not being involved and walks away to water the plants.*

In background: *excitement involving the rain gutters*

~Much later that night~

All humans: *watching Tucker and Dale Vs. Evil* *decide to pause for bathroom, soda refill, popcorn, etc.*

LabRat: *goes to let the dogs in, where they have been camping most of the night due to its being unseasonably cool out* “Dogs! Inside! Tank! Kodos!”

Kang: *way too sleepy for this BS*

Kodos: *also too sleepy, glares mournfully from comfy spot outside*

Tank: *is clearly otherwise occupied but paying attention*

LabRat: *cheerleads for a bit*

Indy: *returns from bathroom, joins varsity dog cheerleading squad*

Tank: *runs to join his fans*, *is also covered in blood on his face and left shoulder*

Kodos: *moseys unenthusiastically to join his fans*

LabRat: “Oh good lord. Here, hang on to Kodos while I look him over.”

*examines bloody areas extensively* *finds no actual wounds*

Stingray: *joins conversation* “Check Kodos. He probably busted a nail and then they were playing or something.”

Indy: *hangs onto Kodos while I examine his legs and feet*

Kodos: *endures stoically, is horrified I might cut his nails*

LabRat: *finds intact nails, no wounds*

Stingray: “Well… neither of them seems hurt, and neither of them is spun up at all…”

Indy: “Maybe they caught something?”

Stingray: “And Tank rolled in it. The face-to-shoulder roll.”

All: *To the yard! With flashlights!* *search!*

Tank: *pines from behind back door*

Kodos: *without words* “Screw you guys, I’m going to bed.” *exits scene*

LabRat: “Ah. Found it.” *shines light on late rat*

Regular Rat: *is very emphatically late* *is also somewhat squashed, as though rolled upon by exuberant 100-pound puppy*

Indy: “Ah, guess we don’t have to worry about the rat that was in the gutter anymore.”

Stingray: “It’s a big rat. He might have got some licks in.”

LabRat: “He’s a big dog. I don’t think any of it was his own blood. Here, I’ll keep the light on it while you go get a plastic bag.”

Stingray: *withering look at me* *picks up rat by hind leg, starts in direction of outdoor trash*

LabRat: “Or… you can just… do that… whatever.”

All: *join trek to garbage can for rat disposal ceremony*

Stingray: “Here, catch!” *flings rat at friend, in fit of high spirits*

Indy: “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” *undignified scramble*

LabRat: “…OK, from this end, that IS hilarious.”

Kang: *has slept through ALL OF IT* *does not give even one single damn*

~Fin~

Posted Dogblogging |