I Knew This Day Would Come
Irradiated by Stingray
Barack Obama confirmed many of our worst fears today:
“On this Memorial Day, as our nation honors its unbroken line of fallen heroes — and I see many of them in the audience here today — our sense of patriotism is particularly strong.”
It gets worse. The outbreak has begun in Las Cruces, NM. I knew the town didn’t look particularly full of vim and vigor the last time we passed through, but I had no idea that our war dead had risen from the grave to consume the questionable brains of the students at NMSU. We here in Los Alamos may have some hope. Surrounded by the mountains and sheer cliffs, we may be able to draw on the by no means trivial firepower of the local citizens, combine it with the latest technology from LANL, and erect sufficient blockades to keep the shambling masses at bay. Sadly, with Las Cruces a mere 300 miles away we will probably encounter heavy assault much sooner than other places.
The remote mountaintop location of Los Alamos has been vital in our past to maintaining security. Let us only hope that the anti-LANL zombie appeasers have not weakened us beyond hope of surviving the coming conflict. Our thoughts and prayers go to those further south in the state such as Stephen Bodio. Stay strong in the face of the coming undead, and remember: only headshots count!
May 26th, 2008 at 11:31 pm
Well, If He gets elected Presidential speeches could go from painful to listen to to ROTFL. Not quite sure what to make of that.
May 27th, 2008 at 2:47 am
You *are* talking about the frontrunner of the party that has a lock on the graveyard vote, after all.
May 27th, 2008 at 5:42 am
As they were soldiers they’ll probably be fairly organized – we don’t stand a chance. At least we’ll have the honor of being eaten by former patriotic Americans who gave their all.
P.S. Oh, I hope CrankyProf sees this, she’s big on zombies.
May 27th, 2008 at 7:38 am
Look at it this way — anyone who was there expecting a patriotic speech from Obama wasn’t in any danger of having a brain eaten.
May 27th, 2008 at 6:56 pm
Out here in the weeds, those of us who still live are reduced to relying on Security Through Obscurity – never a good plan. Unfortunately, the midwest has a legacy of eaten brains and socialist policies which stretches back to the New Deal.
Perhaps we can gain you some time as, spread across the plains, we’re devoured one by one and in our small groups. Here’s wishing you well in your mountain fastness.
May 30th, 2008 at 12:46 pm
The Kimber is at hand, never fear.
But I worry more about Obamistas than Zombies.
One of our local hippy farmers in the Valley has turned from Ron Paul to Obama. To be (un) fair he at one time had a Paul sign in his front yard and illegal — excuse me , UNDOCUMENTED– workers in his barn.
My head hurts. Not for the first time this season.
May 31st, 2008 at 9:31 pm
I suspect Obama had in mind by “fallen” both those deceased and those injured in war.
Julie
May 31st, 2008 at 10:02 pm
“I suspect Obama had in mind…”
And I’m pretty sure Bush *meant* to pronounce “nuclear” correctly, and didn’t *really* mean “misunderestimated” and…
If it’s good for the goose…