Archive for the ‘Friends’ Category

KTKC Beer Update

September 19, 2014 - 6:53 pm 1 Comment

The Emergency Medical Bock for the Kilted to Kick Cancer prize package went into the secondary fermenter today. Sneaked a little out while it was siphoning over, and by sheer luck discovered that there was one (1) bottle of the original mix left in the very back of the fridge. Well conditioned by now, I’m sure.

I gotta say, even un-carbonated, and before the second ferment and bottling, I think the new stuff is slightly better. Ironically I’m not really so much a fan of my own beers, but I’ll give the new stuff the nod here. LabRat says that if they carried this at the local brewpub, she would punch people if they ran out (I knew I married her for a reason).

So, if you missed that it’s entirely possible I’ll be doing a kilted greased pig chase, on video, along with courting frostbite, you’ve still got time to chip in to Kelly’s team.

And since, as MattG puts it, I have no brakes on my dare-car, y’all know what’s coming.

Get Kelly to an even thou, or KTKC overall to 15 kilobucks, and I’ll do the kilted greased pig chase while channeling one of my spirit animals. I mean, that almost looks like a kilt, right?

Click the link, pick team Ambulance Driver, and donate.
Get kilted. Get checked.

Kilted to Kick Cancer 2014

September 8, 2014 - 4:45 pm 4 Comments

Well, it’s September and the silence here has probably been noticed. I’ll get the bad news out of the way first. I’m sorry, folks, but the situation here right now is such that I don’t have the gas in the tank to do the drive justice this year, so I’m mostly sitting out. Mostly.

Now the good news. KTKC is officially a 501(c)3 charity. Formal. Legit. The whole shebang. Congratulations to Kelly, Happy Medic, Mrs. Happy Medic, and Motorcop, and my personal thanks for all the hard work fighting with the IRS that had to go into this conversion. The momentum this project has gained amazes me and simultaneously pains me since I’m mostly sitting out.

Now for that one little word. Mostly. First off, I’ve got a batch of Emergency Medical Bock about halfway fermented as I type this. Kelly will happily shank people for this stuff, but it could just be he burned out all his tastebuds with spicy gumbo or something. A case is going into the prize pot for the year. And if the IRS or ATF have a beef with giving away booze, I may find myself a new best friend at the end of the month, wink wink nudge nudge, subtle as a brick and all that. You want it? Sign up instructions and complete listings of the prizes are here. Get kilted and get to work.

Now for those of you who don’t like shitty beer, I’ll up things a little more for good measure. Kelly is already making promises for this year for his fund raising efforts. As the song goes, my friend, anything you can do I can do better. #dunkyourjunk? I’ll *salt* my ice water to get it colder than Kelly’s, and I’ll stay in longer. The audio for my waxening from KTKC past is still over in the sidebar, too.

One in seven men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer. My dad was one of those, but thankfully not the one in thirty six who will die from it. I’ve got a personal stake here, so Kelly? Here’s a gauntlet for you to throw where ever you like. I’m already in for the ice water, but on top of that, you cook up the stunt and the fund raising goal, and I’ll make it happen. Just, uh, keep in mind Labrat will be unhappy if anything is rendered permanently unusable. I think you can imagine how that’d go if she gets upset. Personally I’d like to see you stomp a mudhole in JayG and walk it dry just to de-throne the bastard, but do with this questionable gift as you will.

Get kilted. Get checked. Get this thing licked. Wait, phrasing. Beat. Get this thing beat.

My Turn

March 26, 2014 - 12:40 pm 4 Comments

So this is a week late and five bucks short (Inflation! #thanksobama!), but I’ve got a bit of dust to blow off the keys too. Originally I’d planned to do this on a Monday since all 3 people who still check this digital graveyard likely do so at the start of the week and move on, but I figured I’d take the bounce off LabRat posting to see if I could get a few more eyes to:

The Grey Man Vignettes

Everybody’s favorite spooky curmudgeon OldNFO done wrote hisself a book. He was even desperate gullible misguided enough to throw early copies at me to help with the editing process, so I’m getting a bit of vicarious ego off watching it do this well myself.

It’s a good little read. It’s not Clancy technoporn, it’s not Dickens being paid by the word, it’s just a solid character-run series of short, loosely connected glimpses into the lives of some good ol’ boys (the good kind) doing their thing. Worth snagging for a solid couple hours entertainment.

Pupdate: Major Has A Home

November 9, 2013 - 11:56 am 5 Comments

And that’s official, records and contracts exchanged, signed, and collated, and Major has a new owner. I’ll be part of the transport chain to get her to her new home in about two weeks.

Thanks especially to Farmgirl, who raised money to help her and make it easier for whoever has her (her, me, any new owner) to cover her inevitable vet bills. All money raised will go by check or money order along with her health certificate during the transport- the hat was passed for her, and with her it will stay.

Overheard at Breakfast

October 11, 2013 - 4:50 pm 6 Comments

“I have a gun you know.”
“Well lah-dee-dah.”

Breaking Radio Silence

January 14, 2013 - 10:49 pm 15 Comments

Oh, this thing is still on? Hey, sorry about that*. So 2012 pretty well sucked crusty green donkey whangers, we’re all on the same page there, right? Well, a whopping two weeks in, ’13 is already a mixed bag but trending positively. LabRat has unfortunately spent the majority of the year thus far sick as a dog, hence a good chunk of the lack of content, but it has now been a whole couple hours since she attempted to hack a chunk of lung across the room, so we’ll take what we can get.

I know there have been some** requests for dog pictures as easy filler content. Good news! I have dog pictures! And you can just wait patiently for them because today’s story is about a pie.

See, during the Rama-mas-zwa-inox-ukah-years down time, longtime friend and part time dogsitter Indy was spending a good chunk of her grad student winter break here at Nerd Ranch. This meant that I had Help available in the kitchen. I know it’s odd, but LabRat and I mostly just get in each other’s way, despite many years of marriage, but Indy and I dance like Fred and Ginger*** in the kitchen for reasons unknown. So with little to do and help available, a recipe was floated before me leading to the phrase “Why not? It’s not like there’s anything else going on.”

If you ever hear me say that about a recipe again, just shoot a tranq dart in my neck right then and there and be done with it, mkay?

Now the actual recipe comes from the ambitious but excellent A Girl And Her Pig. The fact that the cover of the book pisses so many crybabies off is reason enough to buy it, but despite the aftermath of this particular misadventure there’s a bunch of stuff in there that still looks awesome and will be tried later. The culprit today, however, was “Beef and Bayley Hazen Pie,” a concoction of rib meat, blue cheese, and some other strong flavors.

Cutting to the chase, this is a multi-day cook project, involving a from-scratch crust and a couple hours of stove time and still a long bake. This is not a fire-from-the-hip recipe. Regardless, Indy and I set about it and made steady progress. Right up until the final step of putting the shell together. See, in the book the final product is supposed to look like this:

The sphincter was prophetic.

I’m sorry, no. I am not making a giant asshole pie. I don’t care that the woman uses the whole pig or if she gives to charity or what, I simply will not serve a giant sphincter. But you all know what a classy motherfucker I am. And it’s pie dough, not marble, so I’m pretty sure I can figure something out. And I did.
Slightly nsfw below the jump.

Save Ferris Tam

November 10, 2012 - 6:42 am 5 Comments

Ok, I know we’re starting to sound like a one-note monkey here asking y’all to open your wallets, but fuckall if I’m going to let that stop me on this one. Posting this from the road is a pain in the ass, so I’ll be brief.

Tam has a problem.

Lawdog and Old NFO and others you can see linked there (sorry, shitty keyboard makes linksmithing a pain in the ass- details are at LD and NFO’s) are working a solution. Go click over to them, open your wallet up, and do some direct good for one of the people who caused us to start blogging in the first place, and her links to us are a big reason we got enough traffic starting out to even keep bothering trying to gin up the stuff y’all seem to inexplicably like. There’s prizes and shit. Go. Donate.


October 29, 2012 - 8:50 pm 7 Comments

Ok, my apologies for the delay. I know everybody else has had their Kilted to Kick Cancer rewards up for a while now. Right around Blogorado o’clock, my project at work went on the chopping block, to simplify, so the day job has been in panic mode for the better part of the month. Combine that with functionally all of my non-work hours being absorbed by various other commitments, free time has been at something of a premium.

That said, time to make good. The audio of The Waxing is available here, and will be going up in the sidebar once I’m done editing this post. I had to pull in a favor from FarmGirl to get this cleaned up and in a useful format, and it amused her greatly, so there is also a sped up version that sounds like Alvin and the Chipmunks available here. Big thanks to FG for the help; this would still be sitting in my to-do pile and wouldn’t have the bonus comedy version otherwise.

The songs are still coming. I promise they’re not forgotten, and pretty much everybody who was crazy enough to send in for the drawing has said “Just post it!” so I’m going to save a step of picking winners and just do that. You all won, hooray!

Thank you all very much for your donations. To have raised $2400 just from my blatherings on the internet for such a good cause is humbling. I mean it honestly when I say I hope you all enjoy hearing me suffer for every penny (and yes, there was a lot of alcohol involved. Duh.).

Overheard at Nerd Ranch

October 29, 2012 - 3:39 am 5 Comments

Why are you doing this to me?! First you brought him a mace, then a blowgun, and now you turned his rifle into a stabbing gun?! *gestures at small holes in the drywall* What do you think is going to happen when you do these things? STOP STABBING THE CEILING!

Flying Dinosaurs!

October 9, 2012 - 4:08 pm 3 Comments

Ok, slightly bait-and-switchy, but it got your attention didn’t it? Our friend Stephen Bodio seems to have gone and gotten a new book out.

I have not read this tome yet myself, but I do intend a copy to go in the ever-expanding pile of matter I intend to read, despite said pile rapidly approaching a volume sufficient to collapse in on itself and begin a self-sustaining fusion reaction. The man knows of whence he speaks, and while raptors are not a niche most, if not all, of the readership here will never have more than passing contact with, how can you argue against the inherent coolness of working with an animal that is essentially a vector calculus engine attached to a propulsion unit and a bag of knives? They can be funny, too.

If you’re so inclined, you may find An Eternity of Eagles through a handy Amazon referral that will benefit two people a once with no additional cost to you. I’m looking forward to when ever I can mow through enough of the to-read backlog to get on this one.